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General Motors vs. Microsoft
At a
recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates
reportedly compared the computer industry with the
auto
industry and stated "If GM had kept up with
technology like the computer industry has, we would all
be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1000
miles to the gallon."
In response to Mr.
Gates' comments, General Motors
issued the following press release (by Mr. Welch
himself, the
GM CEO) "If GM had developed technology
like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the
following characteristics:
1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice
daily.
2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road,
you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally, executing a maneuver, such as
a left turn,
would cause your car to shut down and refuse
to restart,
in which case you would have to reinstall the
engine.
4. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought
"Car95" or "CarNT". But then you would have to buy more seats.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by
the sun, reliable,
five times as fast and twice as easy to drive.
6. The oil, water temperature and alternator
warning lights would be
replaced by one "general car default"
warning light.
7. New seats would force everyone to have the same size bottom.
8. The airbag system would say ("Are you sure?" before going off).
9. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you
out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the
door handle, turned the key, and grabbed hold of the radio
antenna.
10. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of
Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even
though
they neither need nor want them. Attempting to delete
this
option would immediately cause the car's performance to
diminish
by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for
investigation
by the Justice department.
11. Every time GM introduced a new model car, buyers would have to
learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls
would operate in the same manner as the old car.
12. You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.
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